We all have a birth story. Whether we were born via c-section or vaginal delivery, we got here one way or another. Although some birth stories are not as “glamorous” and beautiful as others, they all end the same- Baby has arrived!
My first baby has a birth story. I wouldn’t call it amazing or out of the ordinary. To me, it was more traumatic than anything else and it took me a year, if not more, to accept that without medical intervention we both might not be here. Now, it’s not as dramatic as it seems, but at the time it was emotional, overwhelming, and left me with a lot of questions.
My pregnancy with my older baby was normal – besides the typical discomforts of pregnancy and the threat of bedrest at 34 weeks. She was average in size, and I’m average size, so we didn’t think that “size” would be an issue – until I stopped progressing at 7 cm after being in labor for over 2 days. I had to have a c-section, but nonetheless, my little girl had a birth story that spanned 48 hours leading up to her birth.
My next baby will be greeting us in just a few short weeks and I’m left wondering how I will feel if I do not have a VBAC (you can check out my previous post on VBAC). It seems so routine at this point to just check into the hospital, change into a gown, get a spinal, then lay on a table and have a doctor pull a baby out of me. Is it really THAT simple? There is no “labor of love” or beautiful entry into this world in a tub of water. Unfortunately, this is how 30% of the population is coming into the world these days. Does it really matter? Do people really care to have a proper “birth story”?
A C-Section did not prevent me from bonding with my baby, breastfeeding her until she was a year old, and the enjoyment of being a mom. So why does it bother me so much that a potential repeat c-section is in my future? Some people willingly sign themselves up for a c-section because spontaneous labor doesn’t fit into their schedule. Ever hear of being “too posh to push?” I too am afraid of having my lady parts damaged from the trauma of labor, but that wouldn’t stop me from attempting a vbac – plastic surgery has come a long way!
I read stories of other moms who have labored, had a midwife, pulled their baby out themselves, and had their hubby cut the cord. I’m left wondering if I would feel robbed if I didn’t at least attempt a “normal” delivery- even if it does include a typical hospital setting, a pitocin drip and an epidural (because I am NOT superwoman and pain is NOT my friend!) I never thought I would feel this way, as I am not one to feel robbed of pain and disappointment (as I endured the first time around.) I keep in perspective that in the end, I will have a baby in my arms, regardless of how it comes into this world. I will be ecstatic that my family is expanding and hopeful that there are no complications along the way.
So I would love to hear from you – what is your take on repeat or scheduled c-sections and birth stories?
I had to have 2 c- sections, first out of necessity, second because the doctor wanted to. I never questioned him, until after my second was born and one of my friends have a vbac, which went very well for her. I wonder if I could have done that, or if we would have run into other problems. None the less, sometimes I wonder if I got jipped from that ‘natural’ experience too… but in the end the kids were fine and it was all good 🙂
I had a vaginal delivery with my first, however I had to be induced on my due date because my amniotic fluid was low. My doctor knew I didn’t want to be induced and was supportive of my wishes, so when she said it was time to do it, I knew it was for a good medical reason. It was a very long day – started at midnight and she was born around 9:30 pm, with help from the vacuum. I was a strong pusher and the pushing phase would have been relatively easy but my baby girl had her head rotated a little to the side and her hand stuffed up there! I felt bad about not being able to do it all without help and I hoped I’d be able to do that with #2. It was not meant to be! My son was a big baby, estimated at 10 lbs by ulttrasound and after almost 2 hours of pushing it was obvious he was not coming out that way. I had been laboring all day long and was so totally worn out I was afraid I wouldn’t have the strength to hold my baby when he was born. He turned out to be 12 lbs 8 oz! I had apparently developed gestational diabetes late in my pregnancy and even though my doctor did everything right, it just didn’t show up on the tests. Recovery from a c-section was much harder than a vaginal delivery but I have been able to exclusively breastfeed my son for 6 months and counting (breastfed my daughter til 13 months) and my babies are happy and healthy. I think as mothers we will always find reasons to feel guilt but the people we raise our kids to be matter much more than how they came into the world. I hate that people like us are made to feel less because we didn’t have a natural “normal” birth experience. That was my goal with each of my babies and I did everything I could to make it happen, it just wasn’t meant to be. I want to have another baby and I don’t know if I would try for a VBAC, I want to but considering my track record I think I would just schedule a c-section. Sorry for writing a book! I wish you the best, however it happens 🙂
I had an emergency C with my daughter and then a VBAC with my son. I don’t think that having a scheduled C section is wrong, and until the last few months of my sons pregnancy I thought that’s what we would be doing. (the hospital in NC didn’t allow VBACs but then we moved to Boston where they did) my worst fear was that I would end up with a *second* emergency C (since the first one was such a nightmare). Like you the C section didn’t end up making me bond, breastfeed, or any of that good stuff. I *am* very thankful that I ended up going with the VBAC though! Here is my sons birth story (it was rather crazy too 🙂 ) if you’d like to read it. And if you have any questions I’d be happy to talk to you about it! 🙂 http://www.wyominggirlcoastiewife.com/2010/07/grand-arrival.html